Teddy Bears have been around for over 100 years, but that doesn’t stop designers and inventors from coming up with wacky new ways of using, altering, or (in some cases) destroying them!
From the innovative to the kitsch, the world of Teddy Bears is full of inventive new ideas, ranging from the wonderfully touching, to the downright weird!
The Teddy Bear Gun
Surprisingly, this isn’t a joke! This Japanese ‘toy’ has actually been designed to make life easier at your wedding! Instead of throwing confetti at the bride and groom, the Japanese go one step further and throw Teddy Bears!
Naturally, someone somewhere in Japan realised that this tradition could be made a whole lot easier if they had a gun to ‘throw’ the Teddy Bears for them, and so created the Teddy Bear Gun.
This contraption– produced by Japanese paintball gun manufacturers, Sunamiya– utilises the science behind their paintball guns to thrust the Teddy Bear through a transparent barrel, high into the air with a simple ‘click’ of the trigger.
Fortunately, no Teddy Bears are injured with the use of such a contraption as each bear is fitted with their own mini parachute, so they glide safely and gracefully back down to Earth to wish the bride and groom well on their journey.
USB Teddy Bear
That’s right, a data-storing Teddy Bear! At a first glance this is just a normal, cute Teddy Bear, but once you pull its head off (Yes, you are required to decapitate this poor Teddy Bear!), it suddenly becomes a USB memory stick, with the head acting as the cap.
When plugged in, it appears as though the Teddy Bear is being sucked into your computer! Poor thing. Maybe someone had a score to settle? We’re not too sure when, or even if these Teddy Bears will come on to the market. So if you don’t feel like waiting to find out, it can’t be that hard to pull apart one of your much loved cuddly toys…
The ‘Huggable’ Teddy Bear definitely fits into our ‘wonderful’ category!
This Teddy Bear is being developed to act as a robotic companion for the ill, elderly or infirm who are unable to enjoy the presence of real animals, and the benefits this can bring. The idea of the ‘Huggable’ was born after clinical trials proved that animals can reduce stress levels in patients, but some- due to allergies or local restrictions- are not able, or allowed to have access to such animals.
Making use of the latest sensate-skin technology, cameras in the eyes, microphones in the ears, wireless technology and data collection techniques, the Teddy Bear has been intelligently designed to respond to touch in the way a real animal would, and then communicate in an appropriate manner.
The aim is to provide a helpful tool for care providers that is emotionally pleasing and provides real, measurable health benefits to patients. This has to be the most advanced, forward thinking, technologically packed Teddy Bear we’ve ever seen!
Teddy Bear MP3 Player
Appealing to Teddy Bear fans the world over, a nifty little Teddy Bear MP3 player, capable of storing 128mb of audio, with a USB connection, and a liberal $78 price tag, seems set to become one of the most useful and practical Teddy Bears available, without compromising on cuteness.
Created by Tomy, and weighing in at only 50g (excluding battery), this rather retro looking product will offer you up to 8 hours of playback from a single AA battery!
Teddy Bear Chair
As soft and as comforting as a ‘real’ Teddy Bear, this eccentric Teddy Bear Chair was designed by furniture designer Matti Klenell. Perfect for any Teddy Bear lover looking for something completely different to furnish their home with, ‘Mido’ is an upholstered Easy Chair, shaped like a Teddy Bear, originally displayed at the Agate Gallery, Stockholm as part of an impressive solo exhibition.
The Evil Spy Robot Teddy Bear
No, this isn’t the latest military project, but a Teddy Bear fitted with the latest and most advanced technology. The Teddy Bear is being developed to respond to the Teddy Bear’s owners’ voice, movements and even facial expressions!
With Microsoft showcasing a high-tech Spy Robot Teddy Bear at the TechFest trade fair, the stage looks set for further investment and development into intelligent Teddy Bears capable of recording moments of your child’s day, reading them a book, and even connecting to a parent’s system in a remote location to enable them to ‘program a repertoire for a child’. The possibilities seem endless!
Initially, this Teddy Bear was designed to plainly track someone’s movement around a room, but since then, the whole project has exploded, and future plans for the Teddy Bear will take this toy to an amazing level of sophistication.
The Creepy Teddy Bear
This may be the strangest and most disturbing Teddy Bear I’ve ever come across, and slots into our ‘weird’ category perfectly!
Called the somewhat reassuring ‘TeddyBearBand’, this ‘cuddly toy’ was surprisingly designed by Philippe Starck who claims that ‘an overabundance of toys fosters infidelity’ in children, leading him to create this kind of hybrid of Teddy Bears/soft toys that apparently meets all of a child’s needs!
With this Teddy Bear having a bunny for a hand, and a dog for a foot, it certainly packs more animals into a cuddly toy than the average Teddy Bear, but I’m worried about the dreams I’ll be having tonight after seeing this thing, let along the effect it’ll have on a young child.
The Teddy Bear Remote Control
This slightly odd-looking Teddy Bear, designed by the innovative designer Leah Culver, doubles up as an all-purpose remote control.
While maintaining it’s softness and child-like appeal, this Teddy Bear makes a surprisingly effective, fully functional remote control. Squeeze the Teddy Bear’s chest to play/pause your program or film, and change the volume with a soft pinch of the ear.
We really like this one! Slightly weird, but also somewhat wonderful!
GPS Navigation Teddy Bear
This cheeky but fun GPS-fitted Teddy Bear (Navirobo) sits on your dashboard and directs you to your destination. But heaven forbid if you take a wrong turn, for your cuddly companion– who even does a little jig when you finally reach your destination– will mock you!
This is a great, laugh-out-loud Teddy Bear, designed and manufactured in (you guessed it!) Japan, will be a great addition to your dashboard that will make your long journeys home far less tedious!
‘You Ain’t Nothin’ But a Hound Dog’
When Barney the guard dog went on a rampage at Wookey Hole Caves, it was no ordinary Teddy Bear that became one of her victims
Mabel, made in Germany in 1909, who previously belonged to none other than the King himself– Elvis Presley– lay mortally wounded, surrounded by the remains of almost a hundred rare Teddy Bears, destroyed by the foul-tempered Doberman Pinscher.
The Teddy Bears were on loan at the time of the attack, displayed at Wookey Hole Caves, Somerset. Mabel– bought for $40,000 by Sir Benjamin Slade, an avid collector of Elvis memorabilia– was, not-surprisingly, the star attraction.
Barney, who was supposed to be guarding the Teddy Bear collection, worth over £400,000 was wrestled to the ground among the remains of the Teddy Bears, with “Heads pulled off, arms, legs here and there, it was a total carnage really. I’ve never seen such a mess, there was stuffing, fluff and bear bits everywhere.”
Sir Benjamin was, understandably, not best pleased!
Do our Teddy Bears have feelings too?
With so many weird and wonderful things happening in the Teddy Bear world, it makes you wonder whether our cuddly friends have feelings and emotions of their own. What would they think of the crazy ideas we have for Teddy Bears? Do they come awake at night and remember our moments of cruelty?
Perhaps it is sometimes true that we form connections with the inanimate objects that we surround ourselves with and eventually humanise our Teddy Bears, and by doing this, we begin treating them as if they have human emotions- pain, fear, love. Whatever the case, here at Funky Bears, we’re sure the crazy Teddy Bear inventions will continue, and we can’t wait to see the next weird or wonderful ideas that people in the same industry as ourselves will come up with!